India’s Most Demeaning

In an attempted elegance, heavily inspired by snow white and quietly literally indeed, she was occasionally seen by most of us in our childhood on a lazy afternoon in Rendezvous with Simi Garewal. If only it had stayed a memory.

Two biggest flaws stand out in the pool of shortcomings of this new talk show.

1. When you are adding the country’s name to your title, you cannot spend 15  minutes on air discussing effective ways to approach and flirt with an actress nor can you arse-lick a recently London returned heavy accented hardly Indian boy who btw, does not have the sweetest smile and sex appeal, only because he was lucky enough that God threw him at a rich Kingfisher doorstep.

2. When you have had a previous show which in all probability is the only way people are going to remember you (if they would), it is your added responsibility to uphold that and come up with a comparable sequel.

I have been lucky enough to have missed the pilot episode. But curiosity made me sit through the third. From the zillion advertisements, even the Prime Minister would know by now, that the guests invited for this pseudo glam show were Ranbir Kapoor, Deepika Padukone and Siddhartha Mallya.

If this choice was not lame enough, the content was preposterous. Twenty minutes are wasted in the host falsely sucking up to the beauty ( sweet smile, sparkly eyes, stud posture, oh-so-sexy figure and unknown oomph factor) of the guest while the guest pretends to blush. This topped up by persistent questions about insignificant love lives of these stars. Please torture yourself for 20 minutes through this show and you will know exactly what I am talking about.

Why would I want to know what a certain tattoo in a certain place on a certain ‘India’s Most Desirable’ signify to another ‘India’s Most Desirable’?  And then, this show is supposed to be the face of Indian talk show industry? Then that, I would term, is one ugly face.

Like every other time, let us look at the West for inspiration. No doubt, celebrity lives are ripped apart by paparazzi and millions of dollars are exchanged over nuptials that last for precisely 48 days. And all this is national history. But then look at Oprah. She is a responsible talk show host who has perfected her way of channelizing her ‘most powerful citizen of USA’ status to do enormous amounts of social, financial and political awareness. She has interviewed stars with greater influence and controversies and yet the entire American population identifies with it. Simi aunty could learn something from her.

I will not even start on other disgusting shows on Channel V and MTV and Bindaas. Axe your Ex and Cheaters and Blind date blah blah are a shame on Indian Entertainment. Staged or not, these shows bring nothing to the viewer. It may be popular among a set of people who sadly know no better, but there should be certain discretion followed by TV channels, realizing that they play instrumental roles in building the society.

Get a life, people. Truck loads of money or hours of camera exposure or surgeries of beautifying will not get you one thing- class. Leave the innocent TV audience looking for some moments of entertainment and refreshment, alone.

May God give us the strength to endure what they continue to show us.

Reading: Rich Dad Poor Dad

Watching: Delhi Belly and Two and a Half Men

Listening:  How to Save a Life by Fray

Suffocation

Jumping with her four year old child from the 19^th floor of her own apartment complex.  A child she brought into this world after nine months of pregnancy and a lifetime of dreams. A son who was going to be her guiding star all her life. A baby with sparkling eyes full of innocence and hope. A kid who she helped to get ready in the small colourful uniform and tiny socks. With bright water bottle and tiffin box for school. Imagine her state of mind as she made her way to the terrace and threw him off before leaping to death herself. What were those emotions? The thoughts?

The helplessness and submission to failure and the tiredness of a hopeless marriage along with broken dreams and self pity. So much more that I can’t even imagine. Are these emotions worth the one life you are gifted with? And that of a child who you have no right to play God to? Well, it is hard to empathize and hence it is unwise to question her mental state of being. But yes, we can and we should question the circumstances leading to her trauma.

She is a middle class decently educated woman. She can be a manager or a home maker. She is fair or dark, tall or short.  She belongs to any caste or creed. She is among us. She is one woman or many. And she is just like you or me. And she needs help to release her from her suffocating life.

As female suicides from high rises shook Mumbai in the recent past, the ugly face of domestic violence and backwardness of educated families came to light. It is not limited to the illiterate areas of Bihar or Uttar Pradesh. This, unfortunately, is happening in more gruesome ways, in metros like Mumbai, Bangalore, Delhi, etc.

I shouldn’t be generalizing by giving in-laws a bad name. But considering the number of examples where their names are roped into these suicide cases, there must be some dark truth about their roles in pushing a woman to such drastic steps. Dowri system has relapsed. This time, the attitude is to ask for riches to make up for the loads of money gone into educating their son in USA. This mentality is beyond me. You are actually making another family pay for the education of your son- how cheap are you.  This is your love for your son? Plain give and take? Disgusting.

Another cause of distress for today’s woman is her helplessness as her executive officer husband finds alternate sources for sexual satisfaction. Prevalent in young, middle aged as well as old class of working men, dating a younger assistant or subordinate or sometimes plain escort is now, not unheard of. “I have the money and the power, I have a stressful job and I buy all the happiness for my dependent family. I deserve extramarital pleasure.” Have you ever thought of the fact that your wife, who today is a home maker taking care of your kids, at the peak of her career and age, left her job and all ambition to raise a good family for you? Have you ever considered the sacrifices that she may have made without even mentioning them? Are you there for her while she fights her battles every day? Are you a friend to your wife? It is amazing how two individuals are married for years and still incapable of understanding one another.

Coming back to the present topic of discussion, it would be unfair to put all the blame on the family members. The woman is at fault because she forgot the basic rule of loving herself in the process of seeking acceptance from her husband, her family and the society. It may be hard to break out of the marital woes, but in most cases, the biggest culprit is the woman’s own acceptance to the situation, pushing her toward the bottomless pits of disappointment, dejection and consequent resignation. Woman, you deserve to break free. It is understandable that you care about the well being of the kids and the respect of the family. But your life isn’t a fair price to pay for it. You have one life; stop suffocating your dreams and ideals. You have as much a right to live and be happy as your selfish husband.

Suicide serves no purpose. With no exceptions ever. Allow yourself to live please.

Remember, the sun rises everyday for you.

Reading: Rich Dad Poor Dad

Listening: Rangeela Songs

Watching: Gone in 60 seconds